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A tribute to pianist Alfred Brendel (1931–2025), celebrating not solely his legendary musical legacy but additionally his incisive, absurdist poetry that skewered live performance etiquette, musical dogma, and the human situation with equal aptitude.

Alfred Brendel, extensively thought-about “one of many best pianists of all time”, died final week on the age of 94. He had performed his final public live performance in 2008. I contemplate myself lucky to have heard him carry out a number of instances throughout my years in England earlier than this.
I keep in mind being intrigued to search out, along with his recordings, his many books on sale earlier than the concert events and throughout the interval. That is how I learnt that “subsequent to music, literature is Brendel’s second life and occupation.” On the time, my job required me to maneuver yearly or much less from one poky lodging to a different, so I needed to be cautious to maintain my possessions underneath management. Fortunately, wherever I went, the council libraries had been well-stocked, and even when they didn’t have the newest releases, one may requisition them—and they’d be procured in a short time.
I keep in mind ordering Brendel’s One Finger Too Many from my native library quickly after it was in print. I discovered his witty, wickedly humorous and sometimes additionally concurrently profound poetry in a category by itself. His zany model of humour was one thing I had not imagined, judging from his stage presence as a revered pianist. The poems had been translations from the unique German, and I used to be capable of take pleasure in them in each languages. It was fascinating to watch how the translations (by Richard Stokes), quite than being literal, took creative liberties in an effort to retain the essence of the poems in English.

Enjoying the Human Recreation (Phaidon Press, 2011) is one other compilation of Brendel’s poems. They are often savoured on their very own, however fairly a number of of them make references to earlier poems in One Finger Too Many. As an example, Brendel makes a wry remark about what a performer has to endure once we are launched in One Finger Too Many to the Coughers and Clappers in “The Poet of the Keyboard”:
“Nobody / ever dared open the home windows / Recent air / would possibly hurt the poetry / the music’s aroma / to be savoured undiluted / by ears flared like nostrils / craving nuances beforehand unfathomed.
However not mocked as viciously because the coughers and sneezers – to be discovered in any respect performances: / Makes an attempt by unfeeling artists or impresarios / to query such privileges / have led to a Coughers and Clappers initiative / Members are required to applaud / instantly after chic codas / and cough distinctly / throughout expressive silences”
In Enjoying the Human Recreation, we hear of the Coughers and Clappers once more:
“The Coughers of Cologne / have joined forces with the Cologne Clappers / and established a Cough and Clap Society / a non-profit-making organisation / whose goal it’s / to ensure every concert-goer’s proper / to cough and applaud.
Distinct coughing is of paramount significance; / to stifle or muffle it / forbidden on ache of expulsion / Coughers of excellent tenacity / are awarded the Coughing Rhinemaiden / a good-looking if barely baroque appendage / to be worn dangling from the neck.
The C&C’s latest merger / with the New York Sneezers / and the London Whistlers / raises excessive hopes / for Cologne’s musical future.”

He will be self-deprecating whereas being humorous, as in My Twin (from One Finger Too Many):
“My twin / if I had one / similar or doppelgänger / confusingly alike / my twin or mirror picture
Might make life simpler for me / joking on TV / placing up with draughts / lugging books about / cooking // practising.
In alternate / he may acknowledge applause / reap rewards titles decorations / be recognised on the street / appeal women / smile coyly / or exude optimism.
One would want / to maintain him pleased although / lest he steal my socks / overdraw my account / blurt out my secrets and techniques / and even attempt his fingers at Beethoven sonatas
Heaven forbid / he would possibly even / drive folks like me / out of enterprise.”
His shorter poems attraction extra to me. Take Brahms (I), as an illustration:
“When at useless of night time the ghost seems / and begins prowling around the piano / then we all know / Brahms has arrived.
It wouldn’t be fairly so dangerous / if his cigar odor / didn’t stink out the music room for days on finish.
Even worse although / is his piano taking part in / This wading by way of chords and double octaves /
wakes even the kids from their deep sleep / ‘Not Brahms once more’, they wail / and cease their ears.
Out of tune and smoking / the piano stands there / when Brahms will get up / ‘Brahms’ he says a number of instances / in a plaintive tenor / earlier than leaving by way of the kitchen door.”

He makes a reference to a different of his books (Cursing Bagels, 2004) within the poem titled Beethoven:
“Within the hereafter / we are able to make up / for all we missed in life.
Beethoven for instance / will be retrieved / as a baker
Together with his customary fury / he hurls his dough into the oven
The resemblance of his sonata to pretzels / was first remarked upon by Tovey
but it surely was Schenker’s acute ear / that perceived the late bagatelles / as poppy-seed cake
The deceased grasp’s most up-to-date composition / his ‘Cursing Bagels’ / curse / if you sink your enamel into them.”
Brendel, amongst different issues, appears to be making a dig at musical evaluation right here; Donald Tovey and Heinrich Schenker had been famous musical analysts and theorists.
He loves wordplay as effectively. Within the above poem, bagatelles are in contrast with bagels. In one other poem, when writing about ‘piano devils’, he offers one the identify Stechbein, which is the reputed piano agency Bechstein in scrambled type. He has a area day with Steinway as effectively. Its first half means “stone” in German, so there are references to “stony path” (“Steinweg” within the unique German) in a single poem. In scrambled type, it will get reworked into Weinstay, a drink that the piano devils like to get intoxicated with on Sundays.

His biting (there are a number of references to biting and being bitten in his poems) humour can have a darkish aspect too. I’ll depart you together with his poem The whole lot (II), a sober touch upon the instances we stay in and our unquenchable thirst for retribution:
“We’re the whole lot / We’re in opposition to the whole lot / The whole lot should finish in the long run
The start of the top / should be a brand new starting / the start of a brand new finish /
we fervently lengthy to start.
No we don’t need a new finish / Our starting / doesn’t finish
What it in the long run begins / is remaining
No we don’t need a new starting / however what we do need / is to kill”
This text first appeared in The Navhind Times, Goa, India.